MODERN MUM: Lead by example in parenting

Sometimes we get lost in the routine of the everyday, and we live life as we have lived it before having children. Then you find yourself being watched by a pair of tiny eyes that are trying to develop their cognitive skills, and you start to question yourself.

I love spicy food and junk food at certain times during the day. Even though I strive for balanced and nutritious meals for the whole family, I do enjoy my cheat moments, which feel ‘rewarding’ after a long day as a stay-at-home mum.

I recently wrote about how I enjoy a glass of a fizzy drink at the end of the day with my feet up to just unwind and take a moment to woosah before bed. Well, it turns out that my four-year-old with very sharp hearing has been observing me. Every time I pop open a bottle he comes running in the kitchen and says “mummy is having dawa!”

Why? When he first asked what I was drinking, I made the uncalculated move of saying it was my medicine to end the day. The thing is, he knows what it is. It's soda. It's the thing I've been telling him is unhealthy, and he can only have controlled amounts at a time. How then was I preaching water and drinking fizz?

I started feeling guilty and ashamed every time he came around to see what I was up to with my end-of-day routine. His investment in what I was doing or consuming made me want to show him a better picture of myself. So I changed my routine to fizzy water. He would still hear the pop, run in, ask if it was dawa, I would give him a sip, he would confirm it was a medicinal drink and he would hop off to bed. Only when he was fully asleep would I allow myself to indulge in what I really wanted.

Meanwhile, my nine-month-old is attached to me at the hip during the day and watches me like a hawk. What I eat, how I talk or whether I'm distracted with gadgets instead of watching him… Those little eyes follow me all day.

It all started with me munching on some crisps. The noise intrigued him and his mouth started moving in sequence. I realised that I wanted my son to eat healthy and to do so, I needed to eat healthy (at least in his presence). So I switched to crunchy juicy fruits. He watches me eat them with interest and I cut him a piece to join me in the munch club.